Vannin

Vannin’ Ain’t Dead, There’s Just No Vacancy!

We’ve all heard the jokes, “If this van’s a-rockin’, don’t come a-knockin’, or our personal favorite, “If the springs are squeakin’, don’t come peakin'”. But, the reality is, vans are extremely practical. From general labor to cruising the local strip, they’re just fantastic for all types of activities. Sure, they might’ve begun to carry a certain stigma in the dark minivan years, but there was a time when vanners ruled. Of course, the vanner life wasn’t just for anyone, it took a special owner who carried with them a swagger and bravado to back up the quirky set of wheels. Now, humor us for a moment, and let’s take a step way back to 1977…

Mark and Dorinda Coates’ sweet 1977 Dodge Street Van is a blast from the bast! We found it at Holley’s Moparty.

Imagine it, you’ve just walked out of a Santana concert to return to your party wagon for a much-needed bit of respite as you come down from a gnarly mushroom-induced trip only to find your beloved Street Van wide open. You immediately catch a whiff of the spilled bong water and notice your favorite Doobie brothers 8 track and bunch of PBR cans littering your mint shag carpet. It seems someone or many have used and abused the big boulevard cruiser you’ve spent so much time building. What’s more, they’ve left it in such a state that you can’t even use it to catch a few Zs. So, what do you do? Pass out in the grass like some shiftless grifter? No. You are instead inspired! Perhaps it’s the psychedelic stupor you find yourself in, or maybe it’s just the fact that you can’t stand to see your prized cruisin’ cabin desecrated in such a way, but you know it cannot and will not happen again. So, you promptly decide to commission a hand-painted sign to remedy this vehicular injustice and keep it from ever happening again, whilst simultaneously proclaiming to the world the name of your mobile hotel – No Vacancy!

The name that says it all. There’s No Vacancy in this mobile hotel…

Alright, that’s probably not how Mark Coates and his wife Dorinda came up with the name for their 1977 Dodge Street Van, but you never know…Actually, we do now since we caught up with Mark at last year’s Moparty at Beech Bend Raceway, but it paints a humorous picture nonetheless. And hopefully, it takes you back some years. If you can remember any of those hazy days, that is…

Back to the Van…Before we jump right into the particulars and let Mark tell the story of how their Street Van came to be, let’s dive into the vanning culture itself. One that the Dodge Street Van had a major role in. The first generation of Dodge B series van ran from 1971 to 1978. This means it was in production during the lean years in terms of muscle car offerings…Not coincidentally, during the same period, Chrysler positioned the B-series van alongside Dodge’s Warlock, Lil’ Red Express, Macho Power Wagon, and Ramcharger in its lineup of “Adult Toys.”…ahem…Phrasing?

Vans just like this used to rule the street during the malaise era of “muscle cars,” and luckily, this one ain’t dead.

Anywho, the Tradesmen models, in particular, were extremely popular among the Adult Toy crowd because of the custom van craze that seemed to be sweeping the nation from the mid-’70s to the early-’80s. What set the Dodge van apart was that the Pentastar brand was smart enough to capitalize on the market trend and offered a factory customization bundle called the “Street Van” package. The Tradesmen was, as the name implies, a stripped-down work van, but those with an eye for style could easily trick it out with the Street Van package which would replace the Tradesmen logos for “Street Van” on the driver and passenger doors, add chrome trim to the grill and windshield, and faux woodgrain on the steering wheel. Vanners would also receive chrome five-spoke wheels, chrome front and rear bumpers, chrome trim gauges, chrome side mirrors, and of course the templates to customize the interior. Additionally, those customers would find themselves in the “Dodge Van Clan,” an exclusive club akin to Chrysler’s, Rapid Transit Unit. The Street Van offering was short-lived, running from 1976 until its discontinuation in the early-’80s. We all know what that means…They’re rare and as such are now beloved by collectors.

The big ones always look good from the back.

Among them, is Mark Coates, who was kind enough to break down his build for us…

Street Muscle: Why don’t we start with your name, occupation, and a little background info, Mark?

Mark Coates: Okay, my name is Mark Coates, I’m in the automotive restoration business and have been for 30 years. The Van belongs to my wife Durinda. It’s just something we put together to have fun with. We spent about a year and a half on the restoration during my spare time since I don’t have much time to work on my own stuff. So, it took a while. But, it’s a 1977 Dodge Tradesmen with all the Street Van conversion parts. Everything you could buy over the counter from Chrysler in 1977 from the Direct Connection catalog.

We’re not sure who first came up with bubble windows, but we sure are glad they made their way onto the side of so many vans.

SM: Mark, for our readers at home who might not be as familiar with the Street Van nomenclature, can you fill them in on what that was and how it was important to the van scene?

Mark: The Street Van from Dodge was essentially the first factory orderable street van to hit the market and kick off the factory support of vanners everywhere. You could say it started the van craze of the ’70s. In fact, they were so popular, you would often see them featured prominently in hot rod magazines during the lean years for factory performance mods. I know several people from back in the day who picked up vanning as a break from the slowpoke “muscle cars” of the malaise era.

SM: So, then what did the Tradesmen come with originally?

Mark: Well, the Tradesmen basically includes nothing. It’s a stripped-down work van. But by purchasing the street van package you basically got a little bit of extra trim, some nice wheels, and it came with a Street Van kit in the back of the van which is basically just a little crate or cardboard box full of templates to do the interior and it came with a bunch of customizing ideas.

Mark also told us that not everything their van wears came with the Street Van package. Some of the things it did not come with were the ground effects such as the air dam and wheel wells, but they were available over the counter through Chrysler’s Direct Connection. As was the rear teardrop bubble window, of which Chrysler had many styles to choose from.

Just a few of the period-correct touches Mark and his wife, Dorinda have added.

Another interesting feature of Mark’s van are the side pipes. Which he explains are, “Currently available through patriot pipes. A lot of people think that they’re fakes, but the bottom rear tube is connected to the exhaust system. It has an internal glasspak inside the tube, plus I added two Dynamax ultra flow mufflers to quiet it down some more.”

That means, the front three are faux, but it is still a functioning exhaust because the rearward-most pipe is connected to the rest of the exhaust system.

As for rolling stock, the van wears 15×8 Cragar s/s in the front and 15×10 in the rear, the iconic wheels are shod in 275/50 series tires in front and 305/50 in the rear. Who knew you could fit such a wide tire on the front of one of these Street Vans?

The rolling stock for No Vacancy is also par-for-the-course in terms of vanner-era wheels. Cragar S/S shod in some thick rubber set the stance off nicely.

For paint, Mark tells us, “It was originally a blue that’s close to Chrysler’s B5 Blue, but it had a little bit of a green tint in it, and 30 some spray out’s later, I arrived at a color that gets rid of that tinge of green. I just wound up adding some magenta to the factory mix.”

Mark also filled us in on an interesting tidbit of information about state registration practices with regard to vans and their commercial or personal vehicle status. “I learned that recently, some states consider one of these vans to be a commercial vehicle. Many of the people who originally built these things would add a porthole window or something in the back which legally made it into a personal vehicle or passenger car.” Bureaucracy at work, ladies and gentlemen…

Wing windows, tons of chrome, and something akin to B5 Blue make for a killer Street Van.

Moving along to the interior, because we know all you vanners out there are dying to know what’s inside.

“Who cares about an engine when you’ve got an interior? – Mark Coates”

The van’s interior sports LED lighting around the headliner, swivel captain’s chairs, shag carpet lined walls, doors, and floors, a full-size bed, and a massive bean bag in leopard print. Mark tells us, “that bean bag came from a company called Ultimate Sack, and that’s not the biggest one they make.” “I found the carpet at lowes. It was a pretty drawn-out process to find something we liked. We just happened to be walking through lowes and saw an area rug and said, ‘This is it!’ and we found out that they were on clearance nationwide and we bought them all.” So, sorry to anyone who was looking for these, Mark bought them all.

That’s not just any sack, it’s an Ultimate Sack!

Now, even though Mark jokingly asked the question, “Who cares about an engine when you’ve got an interior like this?” We still had to ask him about what is underneath the Street Van’s doghouse. Turns out, it is a 360ci Chrysler V8 topped with a Holley Sniper EFI unit and Hyperspark system.

The cockpit of No Vacancy is just as impressive as the giant sack in the back.

As we wrapped up our discussion with Mark, it finally came down to the name…the real inspiration behind it, not the fictional version we pondered above. The truth is somewhat related to our version though. Mark tells us, “We haven’t really named it yet, that’s just a sign to keep kids and people out of the back of it when we’re showing it at shows. But, that may wind up being its name. Who knows?”

Well, it is now. Until next time…

About the author

Vinny Costa

Fast cars, motorcycles, and loud music are what get Vinny’s blood pumping. Catch him behind the wheel of his ’68 Firebird. Chances are, Black Sabbath will be playing in the background.
Read My Articles

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