I walked into the office angry today. Living only a couple miles from work, my commute typically takes me no more than 10 minutes. That allows me about three or four songs on the radio, that is, if I’m not waylayed by the mindless jabbering of the DJ. Nonetheless, I was flipping through the preset stations on the radio when I caught the first chords of Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers’ “Free Falling.” With the volume cranked, the timeless classic reverberated off the interior walls of my Dodge Ram’s cabin all the way to the powerTV parking lot.

The problem? It was playing on the oldies station. When the hell did “Free Falling” become an “oldie?”

I remember when “Free Falling” was released. I remember watching the video on MTV (back when MTV stood for Music Television). I remember singing along to it in the school bus (back when school bus drivers were allowed to play the radio – they’re not anymore). I’m only 33 years old, but I aged decades this morning.

Maybe it was the fact that we had a 50's television and film actor in the white house, or that the economy was pumping on all eight cylinders, but the 1980s sure feel like they were a better time, right?

I purchased my first copy of Nirvana’s “Nevermind” on cassette tape, right before all the moms got mad about the naked baby on the cover. Now it’s 20 years old. When did all the stuff that was around when I was a kid become “vintage?”

My skin crawls when I hear guys call an ’92 Z/28 Camaro a “classic muscle car,” not just because that car is a pile of mid-80’s plastic, but because I was in high school when that clunker came out, and it wasn’t cool then, so why would it be today?

When I was first learning to wrench on my ’71 Camaro, there was a clear distinction of what a classic car was and what cars simply weren’t cool.

Now, in a world where people think “all the good stuff is bought up” only because they’re too damned lazy or socially awkward to go to a local car cruise and talk to guys for leads, goofy ’80s G-Bodies are…ugh, desirable.

Seriously folks, get off of eBay and go outside. You’ll be surprised what you’ll find hidden in your neighborhood.

But I digress…

I like to hypothesize that for those born during the final years of the Carter administration through Reagan’s first term are conceivably the generation most preoccupied with nostalgia than any before. I link this to Reagan’s “Morning in America” themed-campaign, which hinted that things were better off in the 50’s, and by gum, ol’ Ronnie was gonna get us there.

Growing up in a period where the nation as a whole was looking back towards a “better time,” it only goes to show how an environment affects the thought processes of its youth. Now grown, we have a generation of adults longing for a simpler time filled with home theaters, video games and Saturday morning cartoons. Sounds oddly familiar, doesn’t it?

This is not the same Optimus Prime that I remember playing with when I was a kid...

Consider that one of the single highest grossing movies of this year, Transformers 3: Dark of The Moon is a live action movie based on a cartoon from 1984 based on a line of toys. Other franchises like G.I.Joe, The Smurfs, Garfield, Robotech, The A-Team, as well as iconic ’80s movies like Star Wars, Indiana Jones, The Karate Kid, and even Footloose have all seen film reboots, sequels or prequels in the last decade. Even a script for a new Ghostbusters movie is in the works.

Today's muscle gets better MPG than the imports that climbed to success during the gas crunch, offer better performance than the cars they're named after, and tout more amenities than some luxury cars. But do they need to try to replace with yesterday's legends? Image: pistonheads.com

Whether the reboot is either good or bad (and usually, they’re pretty bad), we still call out for them. Despite three really lousy Star Wars prequels, there are still people my age wishing for three more sequels to follow Return of The Jedi.

This lust for modern versions of classics is nowhere more prevalent than in the cars of this past decade.

Ford introduced the retro-styled ’02 Thunderbird which polarized buyers with its throwback aesthetics, while Chrysler’s old school-looking gas-sipper PT Cruiser scurried off showroom floors (yes, there was a time when everybody had to have one of those ecoboxes).

The Crusier was chased by Chevrolet’s failed SSR and eventual blatant bandwagon-joining HHR.

Ford resurrected the “Mach 1” and introduced us to a “Bullitt” edition ‘Stang, which shared little more than the Highland Green hue, manual gearbox and TorqueThrust D-knock off wheels with its ’68 fastback namesake. Dodge presented its new 5.7L V8 as a third-generation “HEMI” much to fanfare of the Mopar loyalists. Meanwhile, GM killed its Camaro and Firebird…

But the retro-train really didn’t pickup speed until Ford’s first generation-inspired ’05 Mustang hit the ground. Marketing chuckleheads at Dodge sloppily slapped the classic “Charger” name on a soulless sedan as Pontiac hurriedly rechristened a Holden Monaro the “GTO” in hopes of cashing in on the retro boom. Licking its wounds, Dodge came back in ’08 with the most true-to-its-original inspiration Challenger, well over a year before Chevrolet’s Camaro saw the light of day.

Everything old is new again. Image: Road & Track

By that time, the vintage-but-modern Mustang couldn’t be stopped. Soon a new “Bullitt” edition was released, conjuring up images of the stoic film star Steve McQueen. Next came the revised “BOSS,” the “302,” the “Cobra Jet” and the “5.0.” Ford’s Mustang simply couldn’t be matched. Chryler’s currently pushing its 392 HEMI, a clear homage to the 1950’s record setter, and its successful “Drag Pak” lightweight Challenger racer – all the while offering a true late-model 426ci HEMI through its aftermarket supplier.

GM dusted off some legendary titles like the “LS6,” though the modern 5.7-liter had little in common with the legendary high-compression 454. Corvette’s all-aluminum modern 427 is still available, and the “ZR1” is the fastest production car the brand has ever produced.

It's not the same looking R/T that you might've come to love, but there's no denying, the new stuff is pretty hot stuff too.

The new ZL1 Camaro and the rumored return of the “COPO” title for its new Cobra Jet and Drag Pak contender are also clear nods towards days gone by.

But why the constant backward glance? Today’s muscle cars wholly out-perform yesterday’s muscle. Do we look at the course of this country and regard the 1950s through the early 1970s as its highest point? I certainly hope not.

Unfortunately, I have no answers to questions like why is it necessary to dig up old titles and makes only to stumble over the established legacy?

Maybe we’re living in a nation where we’ve failed to come to grips with the fact that we can’t go back, but only move forward. Such is the course of life. Like a river, we can labor to fight the current, remove ourselves from the equation and beach ourselves upon the rocks of life, or choose to swim with the current and get somewhere. I’m all for honoring the muscle cars of the past, but look forward to future cars that will someday become legends themselves.

Light ’em up,
Kevin